Sunday, April 3, 2011

hurry up and wait!

Lately I feel like I am just waiting for life to start. Waiting to go to england, waiting to go to new york (or finalize that I am not going.... at least!!). Waiting for chris to graduate. Waiting to live life like a real person instead of the crazy penny pinching maniac I am currently impersonating.

I am trying to remember to live in the now. To "be in the moment" like my mum (the U means my english mom) always says. I know I know. Patience is a virtue... I unfortunately do not posses.

I am sucking at it. Its a moment to moment struggle. Today I was ok at it- decided to just enjoy general conference and take a walk. Until it started snowing and I had to put lolli inside chris' coat while we ran home. And then there I was... waiting to get out of utah.

I honestly think I would feel better if we just had our summer plans finalized. I leave for vegas on my birthday (april 15th... tax day! super fun huh??) and spend a week in vegas going to the doc (a whole different story) and then chris will drive down a week later after finals and we fly out to england the next day- the 23rd. We are in england for 2 weeks and chris flies to new york and then lolli and I follow him a week later. But here is the catch- we have no where to follow him to! We have found quite a few apartments he could live in alone but none for all 3 of us. Apparently people in new york prefer tenants without babies.... we've tried every resource we know of... and are beginning to think we should take this as a sign I shouldnt come.

If all else fails I fly to new york a week after chris- visit him for a bit and then fly to vegas for the summer. Work out with my mom. Have play dates with my friend Britter. Spend time with my soon to come nephew Finn. Lay by the pool and get a tan. So I know I shouldnt be stressing because that sounds like a fun plan right? There is just the minor detail that I wouldnt see my husband for 1/3 of a year. no big........

There is so much irony in our wedding song.... "i've been waitin all of my life for you...."


  1. thats sounds really tough, but everything will work out. And if the worst comes and you can't be with chris this summer i'll be in vegas and i'll be your friend too. Be strong this will all be over before you know it and then you'll look back on it and remember only the good... thats the nice thing about memories, they're always a bit rose colored.

  2. Oh that's horrible!! I'm so sorry! Definitely sucks to be stuck in a waiting game. I always wonder when it ends! I can't imagine going husband less that long even if you do get to be around other family! Hope it all works out though. Your plans right sound way better than mine....Vegas, England, New York, Vegas!! How fun, Enjoy that time you will be together!! Good luck, best wishes!

  3. I never knew your birthday was the 15th!!! Mine is the 14th!!! :) random...
    This was me about a week and a half ago, waiting, wanting to be done with this stage of my life, trying to enjoy now instead of just hoping for someday...I just didn't blog about it, though my journal got a 3 or 4 page entry every day that said basically the same thing, just had tear stains in different spots...We need to get together before you leave!

  4. I'm the former NY-er :) and the one who emailed Dixie back. I'm strongly recommending for Chris to get the apartment for "himself only", and when you come - its nobody's business. Stay as long as you plan on. It IS true - NYkers HATE babies, and nobody wants to rent an apartment if there is a baby involved. Many things that children are a plague and will destroy everything that they come in touch with. Dogs are highly thought of , kids - not so. :) crazy land. Do apartment without a baby in the picture. For a "young married couple", or "just for myself". The LAW states that people CANNOT discriminate on the size of the family, but they do ALL. THE. TIME. So, ignore, and do what needs to be done :)