Monday, September 13, 2010
Where did the time go?
NEXT MONTH is my 2 year anniversary.
What?! Where did the time go?
I feel like I just graduated... but I have been out of high school for longer than I was in it now. Its not that I feel unready... just that I feel like its crazy I have all of this- that I am in this place that I love so much.
Sometimes I look back and think- how did I get HERE? There is no way I could have pictured this. That I would really get to this point and have this much love in my home every day. That I would have a husband like Chris and he would love me UNCONDITIONALLY. Love me for no reason. Love me when I swell up to 3 times my normal size after having a baby. Love me when I am struggling, love me when i'm sad, love me not even in spite of, but BECAUSE I am a little crazy.
My theory? Time flies when you are having fun. My pregnancy felt like it lasted a decade (not fun) but Lorelai was 4 months old in what felt like a day (fun).
Last night Lorelai went to bed around 930. Even though Chris and I should have gone to sleep immediately to try to soak up that extra hour, we couldn't. We got in bed and talked and laughed in the dark for an hour. Like pee your pants, bust a gut laughing. And then subsequently had the worst night's sleep of our lives. Little bot bot woke up every 45 minutes for 8 hours. But its all good. It was worth it.
I still see myself as this girl I used to be- awkward and nervous and riddled with baggage. I still sit in amazement that Chris picked me. Is that cheesy? Sure. Do I mean it? Absolutely. I just really cant believe where life has taken me. And its not like everyday I wake up with "skittles coming out of my arse" (haha just for you Betina) But I really do like where I am at. I love being at home with my baby girl and making dinner for my husband. This very simple life is really all I have ever wanted. What now?
I told Chris that in high school I toured the church history sites and decided I wanted a ranch in Jackson County, Missouri. He laughed and told me I could have a flat in New York instead. Or in London. Or in Sydney. So what now? I have no idea... but thats the fun part.
at 1:14 PM